Hanging out with my boys for the last time the other night, the littlest one kept looking at me and asking
what are you talking about? Now there's a good chance he really had no idea what I was talking about with his older brothers, but so often I feel like it's the same non-verbal response I get from people not familiar with living in Naples. Let's face it- those of us who have spent any extended length of time in
Napoli we eat, breathe, live, speak
Napoli* and I for one forget that it doesn't always easily translate.
*Please don't confuse this with Neapolitan (the local Italian dialect) because I sure don't speak that. And I sure don't speak Italian despite my efforts in year one.
In Napoli traffic
no longer conjures images of China Basin after a Giants' game.
Traffico takes on a whole new meaning of 6 lanes of cars, with several
motos tossed in there to adequately jam pack the 5 to 3 lane merge/exit where
Corso Malta meets the
tangenziale.
Lunch no longer brings to mind a quick bite to eat because
pranzo is a 2-3 course meal, complete with
vino and cloth napkins.
"I just need to finish the laundry" is understood as you'll see me in 5 hours because that's about how long it takes to put a load of clothes through the washer and dryer. Mind you that this load consist of 10 items not made of denim or other heavy fabrics.
New Years? Ha. Until you experience the sky lighting up like a battle zone for hours on end you don't know New Years. Sorry.
The examples could go on and on. Even when I think I found the end of it I'm sure my
Naples would show and we'd add several more items to the list: always carrying around tissue with you for bathrooms, praying that your car is there (and in the same condition) when you step out from the shopping mall, remembering coins for a shopping cart, ensuring you have coins to pay the parking attendant...my friend Jen sums it up much better than I can so if you're wondering about this coin thing check out her blog post all about it, just make sure you come back to finish reading this one please!
<Click here to jump to her blog.>
Sure, Italy may sound mysterious, romantic, and exciting because it is! It hands down in the most amazing adventure I've embarked out on, but let me be completely honest- some days it just down right sucks. Unexplained power outages. Unexplained water outages. Neighborhoods of alarms going off (oh wait, that's mine...sorry). The inability to communicate effectively. Late dinner hours. Transportation strikes. Gasoline strikes. Garbage strikes. Protests. Burning trash. Crummy internet connections. Terrible cell phone reception. Cold drafty houses in winter. Oven hot houses in summer. Hundreds of stray animals. Roadkill littered highways. Delayed utility bills. Obscene sales tax rates. No personal space. Traffic. Roads with more pot holes than smooth road. Hard water. Complete disregard for rules. Narrow roads. Unmarked roads. One way roads being used a two way roads. Being unable to satisfy a deep craving for good Mexican food! A 45 minute drive to get "American food" like Karo syrup. Ridiculously expensive car insurance rates. Unexplained road closures. Need I go on???
For most of you, my life here in Naples has been a complete mystery for the last 3 years despite my effort to try to explain it (
ahem...the reason for this blog). For a few of you, we've witnessed the crazy together and now you get what I'm saying or at least don't question my latest story about what I saw on my commute home (3 grown men peeing on the side of the road, 1 accident, 2 near misses, a road side trash fire, and 2 prostitutes).
My pictures don't convey the chaos experienced on my commute home. I can't capture the frustrations of running up to the roof at o'dark-thirty to see what error is flashing on the
caldia resulting
in a cold shower in megapixles. The late night shouts, slamming doors, firework
explosions...in between the church bells that ring around the clock somehow lose their annoyance factor when you're not the one they are waking up. The having to plan shopping trips around what day of the week it is and riposo requires at least 2 shots of café prior to attacking the day (but night before planning works the best).
The thing is though? As frustrating and annoying as these things can be it's just part of this grand adventure. The rewards of being here well outweighs all of the risks (getting behind the wheel of a car), hazards (toxic produce), & the alternative of missing out on all of this.
Wine is cheap and good. So is the produce just don't buy more than you can eat in 2 days. Adventures are abundant and most days don't require more than a 5 minute commute to meet some character that have you and your girlfriends laughing until tears fall. Take notice to the ancient Greek or Roman structure. Sit, climb, crawl over any important ruin- they don't care...just don't think about a lawsuit because those are rare here. Take time to spend with your family and friends every Sunday. Take the entire month of August off to vacation and recharge. Don't worry about what needs to be done today, there's always domani and dopo domani. Pick up strangers on the corner to drive them to the train station. Honk at your friends on the street as you drive by. Order your coffee of choice in 2 seconds (there's no grande sugar free vanilla latte, no whip here). Stop to admire la babina on her afternoon walk with i nonni. Join in the community festivals. Dress in your Sunday best to hit the local Auchan. Bargain with vendors at the local market. Get that extra scoop of gelato. Smiles get you bellas and your windshield washed without a hand turned out at your windshield. Cappucini come with hearts, flowers, or smiley faces in the foam. Patios are filled with retired citizens gossiping. Practice your Indy500 driving, just look out for the sign announcing the upcoming speed camera. Know the calcio score based on the groans, cheers, and horns in the neighborhood. Over indulge in nutella. Know when there is a calcio match on account of the streets being empty. Laugh at the tourists gripping their bags in fear downtown Napoli remembering that was once you. Return the locals' stare as they try to figure out if they know you. Hang out on the church steps and just people watch. Be amazed by the festive lights set up in each of the towns for their patron saints days.
You know that commute home after a long day? Not so
bad when I turn the corner and see the Baia Castle looking out over the
sparkling sea.
That late dinner time? Sometimes you need a pizza at midnight.
The terrible road conditions? Makes me thankful that Ravi made the trip with me.
Trash burning? Makes for some incredible sunsets with all those pollutants in the air.
Slow moving traffic? Well they let me notice the new blue and pink ribbons outside homes announcing new babies.
The popping of fireworks at 10pm? Perfectly visible from my window above my bed.
It's all these amazing experiences, realizations, attitude adjustments that make the other stuff tolerable. No. That doesn't mean that a broken alarm system at 6am on a Saturday morning won't bring me to tears when all I want to do is sleep, but it does put it all in perspective.
Okay. I still sense the whatareyoutalkingabout look coming through my computer screen. The next best solution would be to book a ticket out here because honestly? Until you've experienced Naples you're always going to have that look on your face. Somethings you just have to see for yourself! And trust me- you won't regret it. Just remember to leave your sparkly stuff at home :)
Talk about confusing! Like I really need more voices competing in my head. I think I'm okay with it though because it means that I did live in Italy enough to pick some of it up. The last thing I wanted to do with my time here is to return the same person (read American) that I arrived as. What's the point in living overseas if you're only residing overseas?
