Not Always Glamorous, In Fact It Downright Sucks Some Days

Often people make comments to me about how fabulous my life must be overseas or how glamorous it is. Truth be told, 75% of the time I'd have to agree even if I roll my eyes when it's said. The weekend get-a-ways, beautiful historic sites, exposure the another culture, meeting new people all take on such more significance for some reason over here. Maybe because it still seems so new?

But let's face it. The same stuff that goes wrong in the states happens here and when it does? It seems a million time worse because I'm isolated, I have to rely on others for assistance, and often have to deal with a 6+ hour time difference to call or talk to to anyone that I've known long enough or well enough to be completely honest with how miserable I am or share what's really going on. Yes, I do have a few fabulous friends here but when their lives are tied up with significant others and kids? Or taking advantage of all the travel opportunities putting them out of reach? A girl can feel rather isolated. How's this for a mind blower- what you see on Facebook that's just the tip of the proverbial iceberg. 

Maybe this week has just been particularly difficult having a fabulous weekend with my grandma and aunts, only to have to say good-bye with the reminder that I'll be home in a matter weeks. Somehow each day this week has passed slower and slower...

Maybe the demands of the office pulling me various directions compounded by the workplace dynamics are just wearing me down...

Maybe the fact that I can't seem to sleep through the entire night without waking up with the thought of what's next? or realizing I owe someone information regarding my next steps is wearing me out...

Maybe it's the constant disappointment of things not coming together, despite careful planning and communication...

Maybe it's the pain in my knee, stressing out my body, totally screwing up my ability to do anything other than "ice and elevate" this weekend and keeping me out the gym...

Maybe it's the fear of having to have surgery again, or the mention of PT...

Maybe the super early wake-ups (due to pain) are taking their toll...

I don't know what it is, but I'm miserable this week. Chatting with a coworker this morning I admitted the fact that I've probably broken down into tears more in the past year than I did for my last 5 in the states. Shoot. I'm 3 for 3 in the past 3 days.

Yes. This is me trying to process and get to the root of it- since I really do hate crying! It's so ugly and not to mention messy with makeup. I know you're supposed to cry and process feelings but I like to know what my feelings are triggered by so I can fix the problem. (This should come as no surprise to any of you.)

And yes. It's proof that things do get a little messy and stressful. Same story line as back home, just a different location and lots of subtitles.